Motivating Kids to - Gasp! - Clean

There are many ways to motivate kids to help out around the house. Often kids are so eager to please and help out that they need little motivation at all from their grateful parents.

For the rest of us -- with kids likely to run from the room when you walk toward them with a broom -- serious incentives are required. We’re really talking about two basic categories: cash and noncash.

Cold, Hard Cash

The most obvious motivation to get kids to do chores is to pay them for it. You probably won’t be surprised to learn that parents are almost as divided about paying for chores as they are about chores themselves.

The anti-allowance parents argue persuasively that kids shouldn’t be paid to help out around the house; after all, it’s their house, too. And being part of a family means giving your time and efforts to make the home a better place for everyone to live—no compensation required. Worse, they say, paying for chores gives kids the mistaken idea that there’s a choice: “I’ll skip my chores because I don’t need the money this week.”

The pro-pay parents argue, perhaps even more persuasively, that a tangible reward for kids’ efforts motivates them to do extra jobs around the house. (In the interest of full disclosure I admit that I’m in their court.) And in the real world, they say, that’s exactly how adults are rewarded or paid for their work. Having money to save or spend also provides an invaluable opportunity to learn important—and tough—money lessons early, while Mom and Dad are still around to talk with.

Here’s an example. “Mom, please let me get another Beanie Baby,” my daughter Lyndsay pleaded several years back. “In a few years, they’ll be worth a lot more than the $80 they’re charging at the video store.”

In spite of my repeated warnings that such trendy items often go out of style, causing any “value” to tank with it, my daughter insisted on using her birthday money saved up over the past two years to purchase the newest model. I gave my reluctant blessing, seeing a lesson looming in the future.

Sure enough, we recently tossed out those “rare and valuable” Beanie babes while spring-cleaning her bedroom. The sheepish look on her face as she threw away the stuffed creatures told me that she remembered our talk, regretting not haven taken my advice. I never had to open my mouth.

On a more positive note, money-for-chores teaches the importance of saving and resisting impulse spending, and that it pays to work.

Noncash Motivators

Rewards for a job well done needn’t be financial. Little ones can often be motivated in a big way with stickers and stamps that are placed on a simple chore chart you can create yourself.

If your kids complete the chores they need to, you can reward them with fun experiences, such as lunch at their favorite eatery (Mickey Ds, anyone?) or perhaps a new storybook from the library or local bookstore. For older children, cash-free alternatives include offering chunks of time with Mom or Dad, such as a father-son movie outing or dinner at your daughter’s favorite restaurant. This is probably overpayment for all but the biggest spring-cleaning tasks, so you may want to give your child tickets for each small task. When he’s collected 10 (or 20, or 50, your call) he can “cash” them in for a mutually agreed-upon treat.

Making it Happen: The Choose-a-Chore Chart

A friend of mine, Anne, adapted a common chore chart system for her family, which includes four children ages 3 through 13.

First Anne created a chore chart out of a large piece of poster board. She made a large table of index-card-size spaces. She listed her family members’ names down the far left column with blank spaces in the columns to the right. In each blank space, Anne placed a piece of Velcro. Then Anne created a series of Velcro-backed index cards, each labeled with a different chore. The children designed symbols for each chore so that the non-readers could keep up.

On Sunday nights, the whole family gathers around the kitchen table to select their chores for the week. They take turns, choosing one chore at a time and then sticking their chore cards on the chore chart by their name.

The children have to choose as many chores as half their age. The 3-year-old gets one card; the 13-year-old gets six cards.

There are three types of chores: standing chores, weekly chores, and heavy-duty chores:

Standing chores are personal chores that you must do each week. Period. For example, making your bed and keeping your room tidy are personal chores. And in Mary’s home if it’s your pet, you feed it. You don’t get a card for this; you just do it.

Weekly chores include cleaning the bathroom, washing the kitchen floor, emptying the dishwasher, setting and clearing the table, and helping prepare dinner.

Heavy-duty chores are harder jobs such as cleaning the garage, cleaning window tracks, raking leaves, and washing the car. The kids earn extra money for these chores. They can volunteer to do them in addition to their other chores to earn extra cash.

Each kid gets 25 cents per week per year of age as an allowance. The 3-year-old gets 75 cents; the 13-year-old gets $4.25. If they do not do their chores or if Anne or the nanny have to nag, they only get a percentage of their allowances—or none at all.
Anne has been using this system for five years. And she never nags.